Have You Seen This Man?

Having solved all other crimes, police are looking for a gentleman who fits this identikit description in connection with the so-called "Jack the Ripper" Whitechapel murders committed recently-- assuming that "recently" extends back to 1888.

The suspect is described as being between 5 ft 5 ins and 5 ft 7 ins, of stocky build and about 148 years of age. The public are advised to exercise extreme caution in the vicinity of cat food shops, bingo parlours, Zimmer frame suppliers and Depends outlets.