Fortress Britain With Only Three Walls and No Door

Because rail travel is not slow enough, the Prime Minister Mr. Gordon Brown unveils his "Fortress Britain" plan that would require all rail passengers to submit to airport-style baggage checks and body searches. Meanwhile, the government launches a "hearts and minds" campaign with the local Muslim "community" in an effort to stave off the recruitment of young Muslims to the Jihadist cause by being really, really nice to them and giving self-styled Muslim "leaders" pots of cash.

Admitting that we are actually at war with a fanatical enemy that wants to kill and enslave us, realising that terrorism is a military and not a criminal matter, restricting immigration from Islamist states, taking the war to the enemy, pursuing the Jihadists wherever they may hide, enforcing the laws against treason and sedition, deporting those who advocate Jihad and telling the EU to go chase itself, warning the sponsors of terrorists to cease their activities or face regime change, informing Iran that if it wants nuclear weapons then Britain will be happy to oblige courtesy of the Royal Navy and a Trident missile, and vowing an unrelenting offensive until victory is won and our enemies are dead and scattered was not mentioned because that would be upsetting to the Jihadists' tender sensibilities.