One Extra Large Elastic Loaf, Hold the Anchovies

In a quest for linguistic purity, Iranian President and Resident Lunatic Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has pronounced a ban on all infidel words, which is an improvement over his previous ban on all infidels. Henceforth, "pizza" will be known as "elastic loaf," "chat" will be "short talk" and "cabin" will be "small room."

No wonder France called Iran a stabilising influence in the region. Little minds think alike.