A little jig of grief

Mourning: North Korean style

According to the BBC, North Koreans are in deep mourning for the passing of Dear Leader.

Apparently, one North Korean funerary custom is wail like a banshee in public and then slip into the back room  to perform a quick Charleston.

Kim Jong Il dies

So ronery

North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il is dead.

The question remains whether his son is bat guano crazy enough to succeed him.

Update:  It annoys the heck out of me that he died in bed, but I console myself with the thought that maybe someone suffocated him with a pillow.

The Crimson Peanut to the rescue

The Elders discuss the North Korean situation.

Some presidents spend their retirement fishing.  Mr James "Jimmy" Carter spends his playing Mystery Men.  At the moment, he's in North Korea trying to solve its nuclear weapons problem–and we know how well Mr Carter was at handling the Communists when he was in office. 

I say "superhero" because Mr "Brezhnev lied to me!" Carter is there on a mission for the World Council of Elders; a self-styled organisation of washed up politicians elder statesmen who think they have some sort of right to poke their noses into other people's business.  I'm not sure if they gave Mr Carter a power ring before he set off, but I'm told that the Elders do like to put on tights and sit around in their domed Arctic fortress of an evening until it's time for cocoa. 

Dear Dear Leader

Strieb-Griebling: I believe it was shortly after World War Two. Do you remember that, the Second World War?

Interviewer: Certainly, yes.

Strieb-Griebling: Ghastly business. Absolutely ghastly business.

Interviewer: Yes, indeed…

Strieb-Griebling: I was completely against it.

Interviewer: Well, I think we all were.

Strieb-Griebling: Ah yes, but I wrote a letter.

Interviewer: Oh?

Strieb-Griebling: I wrote "Dear Hitler. Stop it."

Peter Cooke & Dudley Moore. The Frog and Peach sketch.

In keeping with his policy of hard-hitting action to deal with insane dictators hell-bent on acquiring nuclear weapons that they can use to blackmail the world or pass on to Jiihadists, Barack Hussein Obama opts for the Strieb-Griebling gambit.

Friends we just haven't appeased enough yet

Guardian headline:

North Korea declares all-out push for nuclear weapons

Maybe it's time for The One to make another uplifting speech.

What Does a Power-Hungry Monomaniac Need to Do?

Should the United States overthrow Kim Jong Il, the mad muppet of Pyongyang?

After watching North Korea renounce ceasefire agreements, explode a nuclear weapon, and fire off missiles like Guy Fawkes Night while Mr Barack Hussein Obama can hardly stir himself to ask the UN to table a motion to consider a proposal to debate the idea of draughting a sternly worded memo, the proper question for the next four years is, can it?

North Korea Tests Nuclear Weapon

Meanwhile, the White House leaps into immediate action and draughts an apology.

Robobarista

Yujin Robot of South Korea has developed a robot that can serve coffee.

We had a similar thing in my day, only it was a bit more practical.

Kim on Ice

North Korea's "Dear Leader" Kim Jong Ill is missing and reportedly "unwell".

Fellow reclusive "unwell" dictator Fidel "Maximum Leader" Castro said in a statement,

BBRRAAAAAAIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!!!!

Update: North Korea says that Dear Leader is not ill.

In a sense, this may be correct.

Faulty Towers

Esquire looks at "The worst building in the history of mankind".

I think North Korea has this sewn up.

Axis? What Axis?

The Telegraph reports that Iranian military engineers were injured during an attempt to mount a chemical warhead on a missile in Syria. This comes within a week of an Israeli strike against what may have been a secret North Korean nuclear cache being looked after by Boy Assad and company.

Move along, please. Nothing to see here.

Nuclear Swings and Roundabouts

Remember, an enemy is just a misunderstood friend.

The good news: North Korea agrees to end its nuclear weapons programme.

The bad news: The same load of IAEA dimwits who allowed Dear Leader to get his first batch of bombs is monitoring the deal.

Sleep tight, everyone.

Axis of Evil? What Axis?

North Korea tested its new 3000-mile range Musudan missile-- in Iran.

Nothing to see here, folks. Move along.

Nuclear Deal?

The Six-Nations Talks claims to have made a breakthrough with North Korea agreeing to shut down its main nuclear reactor in exchange for fuel aid.

This is being hailed in the press as a major development, but we've been down this path too many times for me to get too excited. For my part, I'm holding off on the champagne until the US Seventh Fleet is anchored offshore from Pyongyang with all weapons armed to take possession of all North Korean nuclear materials and enrichment machinery.

Let me put it this way, the bottle isn't even in the fridge yet.

Storm Cloud

The Telegraph reports that North Korea is helping Iran with nuclear weapons testing.

Axis? What Axis?