Miss Bryony Gordon in The Telegraph claims that there is nothing wrong with topless sunbathing and that anyone who thinks otherwise is a stuck-up prude. This, of course, is in an opinion piece illustrated with the above image of Bridget Bardot.This is a bit unfair. I might agree with Miss Gordon if topless beaches were frequented exclusively by women of the standard of young Miss Bardot in her prime. I well recall in my youth going to a park in Scandinavia where nubile young women ran about in the all together. Being a visitor in the city and not wanting to appear like the prude of Miss Gordon's imagination, I girded my loins and carried on eating my sandwiches so as not to cause offence. After several hours, it grew dark, so I had to leave anyway.
That being said, I must point out that also in my youth I had the unfortunate experience at Oxford of punting past the Cherwell-side retreat known as Parson's Pleasure where dons of a naturist persuasion used to literally hang out. That was when that I learned that there are some things that man is not meant to know. That experience set in stone my opposition to topless beaches on the grounds of aesthetics and a desire not to have to boil my eyeballs.
16 comments:
Apropos of nothing, I find it highly amusing to mentally switch the words "naturist" and "naturalist" when I see them in a sentence. Try it! "Charles Darwin was always an enthusiastic naturist." "Naturalists are not allowed to use this beach."
OK, so I'm easily amused. So what?
This is a common prejudice, but just because it's common doesn't make it valid.
What right does anyone have to decide who is beautiful enough to sunbathe topless or naked? Young or old, short or tall, fat or thin, black or white, male or female, able-bodied or disabled, we should all share the same rights.
Given the distorted view of the naked human form that we are subjected to every day in the media, seeing a few, normal, 'everyday' naked bodies is actually good for us whether we like it or not. The latest Spencer Tunick project at the 'Big Chill' has once more produced the usual rash of comments along the lines of "I hesitated to take my clothes off in public until I realised that all those around me had imperfections just like my own and so I felt much better about myself...". Now isn't that a good thing?
I think David's point is that there are some things you really (no matter how you look) should keep to yourself. There is such a thing as too much information.
So you are saying that a woman with a mastectomy or a man with a colostomy shouldn't go naked, just because YOU don't want to see these things? Shame on you to restrict the freedom of another in this way. Next you will be saying that black people should keep their clothes on. I hope you take my point. Where do you draw the line and who is qualified to draw it? Better not to draw such a line in the first place because it is the stuff of prejudice.
My examples above? Yes I have seen all at naturist events and no-one has even batted an eyelid. This is how it should be.
Mr Taylor, are you saying that black people are ugly? Doesn't sound very enlightened to me.
No I am not, quite the opposite - I'm saying none of us have the right to say who is or is not good looking enough to go naked. Please read it again.
*Sigh* I really must stop pulling some peoples' legs. They come off in the hand and then it's no fun.
Mr Taylor, I recommend that you cultivate a sense of humour and then reread Miss Gordon's original post and my response to it. I find that Naturists, like Vegetarians and Feminists, often lack the ability to laugh at themselves. This is a major reason why the public cannot take them seriously and make fun of them as a snowballs are drawn to top hats.
Oh we have a well developed sense of humour thank you, but some jokes are so old and tired they are no longer funny and other issues are not suitable for humour. We are sick of the "why are all nudists ugly" 'joke' and I feel that the prejudice that underpins that opinion is no laughing matter because it does real psychological harm to people - not just naturists.
I don't propose to respond to any further snowballs.
Brian - don't be afraid to throw a few snowballs back!
I think the problem here is a common one on the internet; it can be hard to distinguish between the people making jokes, and the people genuinely advocating censorship for those deemed too ugly to be seen.
Poe's Law, and all that.
I rest my case.
Thank you Wunderbear. I particularly like Krohn's Corollary. It looks as though David hasn't got it though...
Regrettably, I do "get it", Mr Taylor. You, however, do not.
Oh, dear, you two. Handbags!
I suggest a fight to the death. Clothed, preferably; I understand your opinion, Brian, but I do not wish to have a potentially entertaining duel ruined by my eyeballs melting out of their sockets as a result of watching two nude, elderly men fighting.
Also, there could be some... inappropriate touching.
*gags*
HUURKKKK
Larks' tongues! Wrens' livers! Chaffinch brains! Jaguars' earlobes! Wolf nipple chips! Get 'em while they're hot! They're lovely. Dromedary pretzels, only half a dinar! Tuscany fried bats!
We've been twigged, Mr Taylor. Up swords and let's retire to the bar.
...I'll have some dromedary pretzels, please. How fresh are the bats?
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